Posts Tagged ‘ La Leche ’

The Skinny on Breast-Feeding

November 13, 2009
By

brownieMajor eye-rolling ensued when I read the article in The New York Times this week about breast-feeding and weight loss. Now that women have surpassed men on the national payroll shouldn’t we be talking about the obstacles women face pumping at work? (FYI, you can check out Moms to Work and The Savvy Gal for those stories.)

To be fair, the Times has written several articles this year on breast-feeding. They’ve covered the health benefits for mothers and babies, a link between breast-feeding and lower breast cancer rates, and the challenges of working, travelling and pumping.  But I am more interested in changing work/life policies that favor working parents than I am in changing my waistline.

The eye-rolling started at this sentence:

These days, more than ever, a mother is expected to bounce back from pregnancy and be a “yummy mummy” in no time.

And really got going here:

Earlier this year, Rebecca Romijn, who wore a shrink-wrapped outfit in “X-Men,” called breast-feeding her new twins “the very best diet I’ve been on.” After Angelina Jolie posed for the November 2008 cover of W magazine nursing one of her twins, she said that it had helped her regain her figure.

Come on, NYT. We expect People Magazine and US Weekly to feed us that load of BS. But the Gray Lady? Surely, you suspect nutritionists, trainers and eating disorders play a role in postpartum celebrity body bounce backs, don’t you?

Maybe I’m bitter because even though I nursed, I’m still trying to shed the weight I gained while pregnant with my daughter. (She’s five.) And certainly, I’m not above wanting to look good postpartum. At my 12 week checkup following the C-section delivery of my firstborn, my doctor asked me how I was healing.

“I’m bleeding,” I said.

She looked concerned. “That doesn’t sound right. Your scar was healing nicely.”

“It’s not my scar,” I confessed. “It’s my stomach. I tried to wear my pre-pregnancy jeans and my fat got caught in the zipper.”

But it was this quote that really got my eyes-rolling:

Ms. Walker thinks breast-feeding mothers shouldn’t feel guilty for loving the calorie burn. “We deserve it,” she said. “She ought to get into those skinny jeans after 9 months of pregnancy and 20 hours of labor. That’s what I tell mothers. Go for it.”

Hey Ms. Walker: You know what I deserve after 9 months of pregnancy and 36 hours of labor? A pass on how I look and a big fat fudge brownie!

 

Why I Hate Breasts

October 2, 2009
By

breast cancerBreasts. I hate them. They are nothing but trouble.

A few months ago, I found a lump in my right breast. As I waited to see my doctor, I imagined what might happen. Best case scenario: there would be no lump. I’d have imagined it and would get felt up for no good reason by some man who couldn’t even remember my name. It wouldn’t be the first time. Pretty darn good scenario: It would be a cyst and I would have to lie topless on a table surrounded by strangers with big needles who wanted to aspirate it. Aspirate, you see, is a fancy word for lance. Worst case scenario: my breasts would kill me. After all, breasts killed my aunt and they killed an estimated 40,000 American women last year alone.

I was lucky. It was a cyst. But may I just say I think it sucks that I have these two potentially deadly inconveniences hanging off the front of me. I didn’t ask for them. And had I been given a choice, I would have said, “No thanks.”

No thanks, I don’t want to spend money on bras at $30 a pop for the rest of my life. My idea of accessorizing isn’t a sports bra, a lace bra, and a bra that works under white t-shirts. I’ll spend my money on shoes thank you very much.

No thanks, I don’t want men looking at my chest instead of my face when I talk to them.

No thanks, I won’t miss getting mammograms. I can always just walk naked into a crowded room if I have an overwhelming need to experience discomfort.

No thanks, I think I have enough PMS symptoms. Moodswings, pimples and cramps are good enough for me. I don’t need tender breasts every month too.

And no thank you, I don’t need my body parts to relocate after I have children. My c-section scar is memento enough.

Now before La Leche comes after me, let me just say that I nursed my children. I am both appreciative and awed by the fact that my body could grow and then nourish a human life. But why did it have to be breasts?

But breasts it is. So please, remind the women in your life to get an annual mammogram and give them a hug. Just don’t try to cop a feel while you do it.

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