Posts Tagged ‘ rape ’

Gentlemen, It’s Called Rape Culture

November 13, 2011
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Penn State footballA coworker was discussing the Penn State scandal. He was so angry. “Don’t the student rioters and Paterno supporters have any sympathy for the victims,” he asked? “Don’t they understand how hard it must be for the victims to see and hear them defend the coach?”

A friend from college posted about Penn State on his Facebook page. He questioned why the media refer to what Jerry Sandusky did in the shower as sex instead of rape. He was amazed some Penn State supporters favored the football program over the well-being of the victims.

A listener called in to a sports radio program I was listening to during my commute to work. He just couldn’t comprehend how so many people knew about Sandusky’s actions and didn’t make him stop.

It’s called rape culture gentleman, and it sucks. And because I’ve been writing about women’s rights for the last four years I am unfortunately familiar with it. I get the anger you are feeling over what happened at Penn State. I feel it too – I read the grand jury report and I cried.  Sadly, I don’t share you’re shock and disbelief over the way Penn State handled the accusations. Nor am I surprised by the rioting students – sickened, sure, but not surprised. And the media, well, I’ve just read too many stories about rape to expect anything else.

Rape culture, gentlemen, it contributes to Hollywood celebrities rallying behind Roman Polanski, the rapist who fled the country. And yes, even though the media said Polanski had sex, it was rape. His victim was a child.

Rape culture contributes to sportscasters declaring during the 2011 Super Bowl that a win could mean redemption for Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger who was accused of sexually assaulting (yes, we know that means raping) several women. As if a Super Bowl title could wipe out a violent crime?

Rape culture: definitely a factor in a community victim-blaming an 11 year old girl in Texas who was gang raped by up to 18 men and boys; some of the accused were star athletes in the community.

And could it have been rape culture that contributed to at least a dozen people watching the gang rape of a 15 year old girl in Richmond, California and not helping her?

Rape culture: it’s what we get when we accept the media euphemisms for rape, or we invoke false rape claims as a reason to discredit victims, or when we put the accuser on trial and hold them to a higher moral code than we do the accused, and when we support the accused because friends, neighbors and colleagues say he was a “good guy.” It’s hard to witness, impossible to comprehend and we’ve seen it rear it’s ugly head at Penn State.

So please, continue to support the Penn State victims and express your outrage at the cover up, the coverage and the misguided reactions. Call people out. Use social media, send letters to editors. And then, remember to extend the same to all victims. They all need our support.

For more facts on rape and information on prevention and victim support, visit RAINN, The Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network.

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Photo used courtesy of acaben’s photostream on Flickr.

 

 

 

New From Around the Web

August 12, 2011
By

woman reading newspaperHere’s a roundup of stories impacting women for your weekend reading.

This one in The New York Times Magazine on parents expecting twins who chose to abort one fetus is sure to generate discussion.

You probably heard that Nafissatou Diallo, who has accused Dominique Strauss-Kahn of sexual assault, has filed a civil lawsuit. Did you hear Law & Order plans to air an episode based on the case? Speaking of DSK, Bloomberg BusinessWeek has an article on whether the IMF looked the other way and ignored the former executive’s behavior toward women.

Cleveland.com reports on misogynist, serial killer Anthony Sowell who was sentenced to death for murdering 11 women.

TechCrunch reporting on the new Verizon Android phone targeted toward women, cites unofficial reports that the droid is “pretty”, has dangly charms and less functionality than the standard variety. Ugh.

And in case you were wondering if FOX moderators were being sexist when they asked Michele Bachmann during last night’s GOP debate if she would be a submissive wife as president, read this piece from RH Reality Check.

 

 

 

Hello Ladies is Back

May 26, 2011
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Last week, Hello Ladies suffered a near fatal blow. The Rapture? Perhaps. But more likely it was the code we erased while making some changes to the back end. Oops! Anyway, it’s good to be back.

In celebration of the fact we’re still here, we have some great interviews coming up, a couple of giveaways scheduled for June, and a new project to announce later today.

Until then, here is round-up of some of the stories we missed while we were out of commission.

Outrageous: A State Representative in Kansas while discussing insurance coverage for abortions and whether or not to grant exceptions for pregnancies resulting from rape or incest, said women should plan ahead. After all, Rep. Pete DeGraaf plans ahead for things. “I have a spare tire on my car. I also have life insurance. I have a lot of things that I plan ahead for.”

Sad, but Not Surprising: Meanwhile, Dominique Strauss-Kahn remains under house arrest while political watchers and the media continue to dissect the events surrounding and following his arrest for attempted rape and sexual assault.  Sad but not surprising, especially when our lawmakers reveal such twisted attitudes toward rape, some in the media are attacking the victim. Ben Stein of The American Spectator wrote, “The prosecutors say that Mr. Strauss-Kahn “forced” the complainant to have oral and other sex with him. How? Did he have a gun? Did he have a knife?”

Goodbye, but Not Really: Oprah Winfrey, one of the most influential people in the world, aired her last Oprah Winfrey Show. Winfrey combined talent, hardwork, perserverance, guts and compassion to build an incredible following. And for that, she should be admired. Of course, despite the emotional send of and fanfare, she’s not going far. She has launched OWN, the Oprah Winfrey Network.

One Wrong, Two Rights: After Ed Schultz of The Ed Show referred to talk show host Laura Ingraham as a “right wing slut,” MSNBC suspended him. And then, Schultz went on air and apologized. Two wrongs don’t make a right. But two rights are progress after a wrong.

More Progress: And finally, a woman, French finance minister Christine Lagarde, is in the running to become DSK’s replacement at the IMF.

Just another week in lady land…

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Today is Denim Day

April 27, 2011
By

Jeans

Today is Denim Day, a day to raise awareness about sexual assault and rape prevention education.

Denim Day has been recognized since 1999 in protest of a ruling by the Italian Supreme Court to overturn a rape conviction. The victim had been wearing jeans at the time of her attack and the court ruled she must have consented because she would have had to remove her tight pants. Women in the Italian Legislature were the first to wear jeans in protest and Denim Day eventually became a global movement.

Denim Day reminds us how important education, understanding and awareness are with regards to sexual assault.  Ms. magazine and the Feminist Majority Foundations have launched a campaign, “Rape is Rape,” asking the FBI to change the definition of rape to accurately reflect the crime. The FBI Uniform Crime Reporting Program (UCR),  tracks “forcible rape” in the statistics it collects on  violent crimes. And the UCR defines forcible rape as, “the carnal knowledge of a female forcibly and against her will. Attempts or assaults to commit rape by force or threat of force are also included; however, statutory rape (without force) and other sex offenses are excluded.”  Click here to sign on to the campaign.

According to the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN) someone in the U.S. is sexually assaulted every two minutes and approximately two-thirds of the assaults are committed by someone the victim knows. And sadly, victim-blaming is still prevalent.

 

 

Four Facts Related to the Cleveland, Texas Rape Case

March 15, 2011
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Reading and watching the coverage of the community’s reaction to an 11 year old girl’s gang rape in Cleveland, Texas, I am sickened. I am also certain of four key facts.

To be clear: No, I haven’t flown to Texas to investigate. No, I don’t know anymore than what I’ve read online or watched on the news. No, I wasn’t there in the trailer. But I can still state the following with no uncertainty:

  1. An 11 year old cannot consent to sex. Period.
  2. Age is not the only issue. 18 men, one girl, videotaping. At no age would that ever be okay.
  3. What a girl wears, says or does not cause her to get raped. Rapists cause her to get raped.
  4. A victim’s parents are not to blame. Rapists are to blame.

 Let’s stay focused on the facts.

Trigger Warning: Horrible News out of Texas

March 10, 2011
By

Horrific news out of Cleveland, Texas where, according to the AP, authorities say they have cell phone video of up to 18 men and boys raping an 11 year old girl.  When we first heard the news, we had no words — only prayers for the girl.

Others had words however. The New York Times wrote about the rape yesterday and included this paragraph:

“Residents in the neighborhood where the abandoned trailer stands … said she dressed older than her age, wearing makeup and fashions more appropriate to a woman in her 20s. She would hang out with teenage boys at a playground, some said.”

A neighbor was quoted in the Times article, asking, “Where was her mother?” Another resident was quoted in a Houston Chronicle story asking about the girl’s parents, “Where were they when this girl was seen wandering at all hours with no supervision and pretending to be much older?”  

Sadly, we aren’t surprised when people bring up appearance in rape cases, but we are shocked to see it reported as a relevant fact in a New York Times story. And we know that the judgment and behavior of victims’ parents, especially their mothers, are often questioned when these crimes take place — even though the only behavior that leads to a rape is that of the rapist.

We’ve said it before: crimes like these, and the reactions to them, are why we cannot be silent when:

Celebrities are lauded by Hollywood despite their actions.

Superbowl commentators imply a win could redeem a player accused of sexual assault.

Frat boys send emails saying women are “targets,” not people.

The Grammys feature a song about date rape.

A carful of teenagers harass a woman out for a jog.

It all adds up to a  culture that tolerates criminals and judges victims. And it’s dangerous.

News from around the Web

March 6, 2011
By

woman reading newsAnother week as busy as we were. Here’s what we missed:

Charlie Sheen. No we don’t live under a rock. We just have no interest in the demise of a Hollywood actor. But this op-ed in the New York Times, “The Disposable Woman,” is a must read. Author Anna Holmes writes of Sheen, “And while his self-abuses are endlessly discussed, his abuse of women is barely broached.”

Speaking of op-eds, Connie Schultz writes on Cleveland.com about the two fetuses who testified in court last week in Ohio. Yes, you read that right. Two fetuses were witnesses at an Ohio legislative committee contemplating a bill that would outlaw abortions after the first heartbeat can be detected inside a woman’s womb – in other words, often before a woman even knows she is pregnant.

Speaking of abortion, The House Judiciary Committee cleared the way for the full House to debate H.R. 3, the “No Taxpayer Funding for Abortions Act,” but they did remove the outrageous “forcible rape” clause. Federal funds are not used or allowed for abortions under the Hyde Amendment. Rep. John Conyers (D-Mich.) said “this bill seeks to expand restrictions in current law and to impose an unprecedented penalty — by use of the tax code — on privately funded healthcare choices made by women and their families. Its goal — and effect, if ever enacted — is to make abortion and coverage for abortion services completely unavailable.”

Speaking of attacks on women, a man caught speeding, up to 100 miles per hour, with his wife on the hood of his car, tried to plead guilty in court, but the judge wouldn’t allow it. The court ordered a psych evaluation and wanted to be sure the man understood the implications of his plea. How about making sure he understood the implications of his abuse?

A reader asked why we cover so many “dark” topics and don’t write more of the “fun” stuff. Because dear readers, there is a lot of “dark” stuff we ladies need to pay attention to and take action on. But we like to have fun too. So, after you call and/or write your legislators and tell them to stay the hell out of your body, check out this fun site we just discovered www.shoedazzle.com. Based on an online questionnaire, Shoe Dazzle selects shoes that supposedly work with your wardrobe and personal style. When you join the service, for $39.95 per month, you receive a personalized shoe selection and a pair of shoes.

CBS Reporter Attacked in Egypt

February 15, 2011
By

According to a statement from CBS, the station’s chief foreign correspondent  ”suffered a brutal and sustained sexual assault and beating” by a mob in Egypt while she was there reporting on the recent protests and the follow on “jubilation.” She was separated from her crew and was eventually recued by some women and soldiers.  She was flown back to the U.S. where she is recovering.

Some reports of the incident and the follow on commenters  imply  she should have known how dangerous the situation was in Egypt. She was not naive; she is a seasoned journalist. She was doing her job. The mob that attacked her harmed her.  We cannot simply dismiss them as “animals,”  although their behavior was inhumane. They were people with free will to make choices. This did not happen during the height of the protest. It happened during what was supposedly a celebration after Mubarak stepped down.

Keep your prayers with the victim and the blame on the criminals.

Viewer’s Guide to Super Bowl XLV

February 6, 2011
By

Will you be one of the 110 million people watching the Super Bowl today? Enjoy the game, the party, the beer and the snacks. For smart commentary on what’s happening on the field, check out Sarah and ClumberKim over at DraftDaySuit. But also, be an informed viewer about the culture that surrounds the game marred by sexual assault charges.

Have you heard the oft-cited statistic that incidences of domestic violence increase on Super Bowl Sunday? Not true. Domestic violence is a problem everyday and there is no proof to support a spike on game day. According to the National Coalition against Domestic Violence, an estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year. Why is it important to set the record straight about Super Bowl Sunday? Because some have used the misinformation as a way to discredit the advocates and feminists working towards awareness, education and help for domestic violence victims. If you need help, call the Domestic Violence Hotline 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) 1.800.787.3224 (TTY).

Dallas officials and sex trafficking advocates are warning people that Super Bowl host cities are hot spots for sex trafficking.  Deena Graves, executive director of child advocacy group Traffick911 told Reuters, “Law enforcement agencies and advocacy groups rescued around 50 girls during the previous two Super Bowls.”  Full disclosure, we didn’t fact check this claim about the spike in sex trafficking, so just like with domestic violence, remember these crimes happen everyday. For more information on how to spot and help victims, visit HumanTrafficking.org.

Usher is expected to make a surprise halftime appearance. I think Janet Jackson’s nipple is much more family-friendly than hearing from the artist who tops a list of “Top 10: Songs with Unhealthy Relationship Ingredients,” according to the Boston Public Health Commission.

At least there are no cheerleaders performing at this year’s game. Neither team has a squad, hence the lack of sideline entertainers.

And let’s hope the ads are actually entertaining this year. Last year’s ads had a common theme: men whining about the supposedly emasculating women in their lives.

The best action could easily be President Obama’s pre-game appearance on The O’Reilly Factor (4:45 p.m. ET). Wouldn’t it be amazing if the President took this opportunity to address the anti-woman legislation Congress has been cooking up this session? How ’bout it Mr. President?

Act Now: Congress Introduces Harmful HR3 Legislation

February 2, 2011
By

Speaker Boehner makes anti-women legislation a top priority.

No means no if you’re certain members of the GOP and the question is, “Does a woman control her own body?” But if you are a victim of rape, no means absolutely nothing. At least that will be the case if H.R. 3, a bill sponsored by Rep. Chris Smith (R-N.J.), is passed.

H.R. 3, is called the No Taxpayer Funding for Abortions Act, but it actually seeks to ban abortions in all but a very few instances including when the pregnant female was the subject of an act of “forcible rape.” Most of us blessed with female reproductive organs, and yes, brains, know that all rape is forcible rape. (An exception is Whoopi Goldberg who has her own definition of “rape rape.”) In writing the bill, Rep. Smith and his co-sponsors fail to define  ”forcible rape,” opening the door for a very scary interpretation of the could-be law. And they harm every victim of sexual assault past, present and future by supporting the idea that if there are no cuts and bruises, there is no rape.

Speaker John Boehner has made abortion a top priority and has said, “This common-sense legislation reflects the will of the people and deserves the support of the House.  It is one of our highest legislative priorities.  As such, I have directed that it receive the designation of H.R. 3.” This is our new reality ladies. We are dealing with a  Congress that seeks to impose their will on our health and our bodies, and unless we can prove we fought back hard and have the wounds to prove it, we don’t stand a chance.

What can you do? You can let your Representatives know that HR 3 is unacceptable. Contact them here. You can write letters to the editor and op-eds expressing your opposition. You can join the #DearJohn campaign on Twitter. You can sign the MoveOn petition.

But keep in mind, that while the language in the bill around rape is harmful, so is the bill itself. Currently, the Hyde Amendment restricts Medicaid funding for abortion.  But Hyde must be codified each year, and has been since it was introduced in 1976. Proponents of H.R. 3 seek to permanently codify Hyde and then take abortion restrictions a lot further. H.R. 3 would deny federal credits or subsidies to private health plans that cover abortion, even if the abortion is paid for using private funds. The new health care reforms allow insurers to accept federal subsidies if abortion services are covered with private funds. That would change under H.R. 3. And the bill would penalize employers offering plans that cover abortions by denying certain tax credits and deductions – to the businesses and the employees.

On the topic of abortion, Speaker Boehner once wrote, “… without respect for life, freedom is in jeopardy. When human life takes a back seat to other priorities – personal comforts, economics – freedom is diminished.” What happens, Mr. Speaker, when jobs, war and other national concerns take a back seat to a false crusade?

More than two women die every day in the United States from pregnancy related causes. Boehner, Smith and the other sponsors of H.R. 3 don’t seem motivated by that fact. Nor do they seem to be concerned about a recent report published in The New England Journal of Medicine that concluded, “The finding … does not support the hypothesis that there is an increased risk of mental disorders after a first-trimester induced abortion.” From the study: “The relative risk of a psychiatric contact did not differ significantly after abortion as compared with before abortion (P=0.19) but did increase after childbirth as compared with before childbirth (P<0.001).”

But Boehner’s not worried about women who give birth. “Women – especially minors – need to know about the risks of and alternatives to abortion … and I’ll continue to stand with all who seek to have a positive and meaningful impact in defending the right to life.”

Look, I’ve got way too much residual Catholic upbringing in me to ever take abortion lightly. And I know what it is to love a fetus – I miscarried at ten weeks. But those are my religious remnants and my personal emotions. They have no bearing on the fact that all women must have the right to control their own bodies and their own health. Period. Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D-FL) referred to HR3 as, “a violent act against women in and of itself.” From the reframing of rape, to the impact on small businesses, to the attempt to control a woman’s right to control her body, H.R. 3 is harmful.

Take action and let Congress know that you too want to, “reduce the footprint of government in our lives,” starting with your body.

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