Yesterday the local news was buzzing with the story of Laura Stone Mortimer, who along with her two children and mother, was allegedly murdered by her husband. I was saddened to see another domestic violence case in the headlines so soon after the mass murder of four women in Florida.
But it turns out I don’t know what sadness is. I can only guess. But my friend knows. Late last night I learned her sister was murdered three weeks ago by her soon to be ex-husband.
My friend blogs at Skirt!. Please read her posts ”I’m Still Bleeding” and “My Sister’s Murderer.” Newspaper stories can’t accurately protray the impact of domestic violence. But she has. This is the true story of violence against women.
And then read this op-ed based on the murder. This is what we need to know.
Hanna Rosin has written an interesting and complex article at The Atlantic titled, “The End of Men.” Citing the recent shift in the national payroll – more women are reporting to work than men, and the fact that two women per every one man are graduating college, Rosin asks, “what if equality is at a standpoint?” Perhaps, she posits, our postindustrial society is better suited to accommodate women.
It’s an interesting concept following closely on the heels of Maria Shriver’s report, “A Woman’s Nation Changes Everything.” After all, women are the breadwinners or co-breadwinners in two-thirds of U.S. households. And, we control 85 percent of consumer purchasing power. Women even represent just a tiny percentage more of the population than men do. Beyond the statistics, women have had some recent, high-profile successes. Two women just won their primary races in California – Meg Whitman in the governor’s race and Carly Fiorina in the Senate race (where she will face another women opponent, Senator Barbara Boxer in the final election). More women than ever before were awarded Nobel prizes this past year, including the first woman to win the prize for economics. And we are close to reaching a critical mass of women justices on the U.S. Supreme Court if President Obama’s nominee Elena Kagan is confirmed.
But neither statistics nor individual anecdotes tell the whole story. For every Sonia Sotamayor, or Urusla Banks, (the CEO of Xerox who succeeded another women, Anne Mulcahy) there are multiple women struggling to take home a fair paycheck, managing a disproportionate amount of housework to the tune of 53 percent more, or dealing with domestic violence and sexual assault. It’s unlikely anyone will convince those women that we’ve achieved equality, not even the dozens of college women interviewed for The Atlantic storywho believe women will “hold the cards” in this new economy.
Rosin must have anticipated responses like mine when she penned the piece because early on she writes, “In feminist circles, these social, political, and economic changes are always cast as a slow, arduous form of catch-up in a continuing struggle for female equality.” That is indeed how I view things. After all, yesterday was the 47th anniversary of the Equal Pay Act and the wage gap has widened in recent years. Women still earn, on average, just .77 cents for every dollar a man earns. That, to me, is “a slow, arduous form of catch-up.” But I also know that perspective matters and where I see the glass half empty, others see it half full.
As evidence that the new world may be better suited for women, Rosin cites some of the same ideas that those of us advocating for the advancement of women have cited. She writes, “The attributes that are most valuable today—social intelligence, open communication, the ability to sit still and focus—are, at a minimum, not predominantly male.” She says that in the white collar world, communication skills and social intelligence are required, and there again, women have the advantage.
And among the working class, she says, the gender role reversal is “obvious and painful.” Men who were once solidly in place as the heads of households now struggle, not only to make child support payments, but to cope with women who are economically and emotionally independent of them.
Things are changing, no doubt. But it’s not the end of men. They still run the White House, and Capitol Hill, and Fortune 500 companies, and newsrooms, and organized religion. But it could be the end of men as we know it. Women have successfully adapted to societal and economic shifts over the years. They were cheap labor in the textile mills then formed labor unions to protect themselves. They entered the workforce in large numbers after the Civil War took so many men’s lives and again during World War II while the men were away fighting. Then they handed those jobs back to the men when the war ended. And now they are moving into breadwinner roles while still mostly managing life at home.
If men can demonstrate the same ability to adapt, letting go of how it used to be and moving forward to how it will be, then perhaps we can move into a “modern, postindustrial society.” Women will make progress, gender roles will shift, and the men will be just fine.
Earlier this week, a gunman in Florida shot and killed his wife, Liazan Molina, outside of the restaurant where she worked, according to the Associated Press. He then went inside and shot at six other women, killing three and injuring the others. When he was finished, he drove away and apparently committed suicide.
Many news stories about the mass murder have run with the headline that the shooter, Gerardo Regalado, is the half brother of popular former Major League pitcher, Orlando ‘El Duque’ Hernandez. But that is not the most relevant fact. What is relevant: police say the shooter bypassed the men in the restaurant and targeted only women as his victims.
According to the Miami Herald, Molina had left Regalado and started a new job. She was murdered after her second day working at the Yoyito Café-Restaurant in Hialeah. Neighbors told the Herald Regalado was sad about the breakup and had stopped eating. Last week he posted several messages to Molina on her Facebook page.
The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reports approximately one-third of female homicide victims that are reported in police records are killed by an intimate partner. And, the U.S. Dept. of Labor, Bureau of Labor Statistics reports that a similar percentage of workplace fatalities of women were caused by interpersonal assaults.
The mainstream media may not cover the domestic violence angle in this case but the signs are there. Seventy-five percent of domestic violence homicides occur during or after a victim has left the abuser. Learn more about domestic violence and its impact on the workplace from the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence and the Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence.
And, for a compelling read on the media’s failure to report on the role of gender and misogyny in crime, read Jennifer Pozner’s article, “From Jonesboro to Virginia Tech – sexism is fatal, but media miss the story.” Pozner wrote (back in 2007), “Journalists could be doing a real service to the culture by focusing on the often-gendered nature of mass violence in America, and by seeking out anti-violence experts who could contextualize these crimes and could offer solutions and strategies for eradicating (or, at least, reducing) this kind of grave violence. Unfortunately, this is not happening.”
The Pulitzer Prizes were announced earlier this week and women won quite a few awards. In the Journalism Prizes, Barbara Laker and Wendy Ruderman of the Philadelphia Daily News won in the Investigative Reporting category for their coverage of a police narcotics squad, and Sheri Fink of ProPublica won for a story on doctors cut off by the floodwaters of Hurricane Katrina.
In the Local Reporting category, Raquel Rutledge of the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel won for her reporting on fraud and abuse in a child-care program for low-wage working parents. Kathleen Parker of The Washington Post won in the Commentary category and Sarah Kaufman, also from The Washington Post, won in the Criticism category. Mary Chind of The Des Moines Register won the prize in the Photography category for her photo of a rescuer dangling above a dam attempting to save a trapped woman. And in the Editorial Writing category, Colleen McCain Nelson won the award along with Tod Robberson and William McKenzie of The Dallas Morning News.
In the Letters and Drama Prizes, Rae Armantrout won the Poetry category and Jennifer Higdon won in the Music category.
These wins are significant not only because the Pulitzer honors excellence, but because there are still too few women serving up the news and not enough recognition for women in the arts. According to the report “Benchmarking Women’s Leadership” from The White House Project, women account for just 22 percent of the leadership positions in journalism. And that’s not because women aren’t interested in the newsroom. Women have been the majority of college journalism majors since 1977. There are no women CEOS at the top 15 media corporations and only 17 percent of board members are women. On the Op-Ed pages specifically, approximately 80 percent of all the commentary is penned by men (according to The Op-Ed Project.) Even the Pulitzer board is comprised of 12 men and just six women.
As far as women in the arts, think of the poets you studied in school. Mostly men, weren’t they? Think of the hoopla around the first women to win an Oscar for Best Director – in 2010. Even the so-called “chick flicks” are created by men. That’s because (according to The White House Project report) women represent just 16 percent of all directors, executive producers, producers, writers, cinematographers in film (this number has decreased in the last 10 years) and only 25 percent of all creators, directors, executive producers and producers for situation comedies, dramas and reality shows.
The issue is not that men aren’t capable of producing excellent works of journalism and art. They certainly are. The issue is that women represent 52 percent of the U.S. population and yet they are so poorly represented among the influencers who shape our national discourse. Even those who rail against feminism because they think feminists don’t value the differences between men and women should be able to agree that we need to hear from more female voices. We are a diverse nation. Shouldn’t that diversity be reflected in the media?
I believe women are so used to reading, hearing and watching male perspective that they become conditioned to accepting those points of view as “popular culture.” But when you review the numbers you see that popular culture is overwhelmingly male culture. When I open most newspapers I see an editorial page written by mostly men (and more often than not mostly white men). When I turn on the television, I see an increase in incidences of violence against women on primetime. When I watch major events like the Super Bowl, I see an all male team cheered on by scantily clad women doing suggestive dance moves and paid for by sexist advertising. Or, I hear Jamie Foxx singing about rape on the Grammys.
It is time the U.S. media better reflected all Americans, not just one slice of the population. So, congratulations to the Pulitzer Prize winners. May all of them -male and female – help pave the way for a more diverse media.
As you have probably heard, there is a major controversy brewing around one of the Super Bowl ads scheduled to run this year. CBS has accepted an ad from Focus on the Family featuring college football player and Heisman trophy winner Tim Tebow and his mother Pam.
While living in the Philippines and pregnant with Tim, Pam Tebow says she was counseled to have an abortion because she had been taking harmful medication to treat dysentery. Pam chose to keep the baby and the result was her football star son.
Focus on the Family describes itself as, “a global non-profit Christian organization with a vision for healing brokenness in families, communities and societies worldwide through Christ. The purpose of the ministry is to strengthen, defend and celebrate the institution of the traditional family and to highlight the unique and irreplaceable role that it plays in God’s larger story of redemption.”
In January the group issued a press release about the ad. “The 30-second spot from the international family-help organization will feature college football star Tim Tebow and his mother, Pam. They will share a personal story centered on the theme of “Celebrate Family, Celebrate Life.”
The Women’s Media Center (WMC) has called on CBS to cancel the ad but so far the media entity is not budging.
I have been trying to write something about the ad and the controversy for days but there is just so much to say that I’ve been struggling to organize all of my thoughts. So, in the spirit of one of CBS’ own shows, I’ve decided to do a Top Ten List. Here are my “Top Ten Reasons CBS is the Most Hypocritical Organization Ever.”
CBS had a policy not to air advocacy ads up until – well, nobody is really sure when.
CBS reversed the policy but apparently only told Focus on the Family about the policy reversal. In fact, CBS and Focus on the Family have been discussing this ad for months.
In past years, this “no advocacy” policy has been the excuse for blocking ads from PETA and MoveOn.org. CBS also blocked this religious ad.
CBS ignored calls from the WMC to cancel the ad stating, “At CBS, our standards and practices process continues to adhere to a process that ensures all ads — on all sides of an issue — are appropriate for air. We will continue to consider responsibly produced ads from all groups for the few remaining spots in Super Bowl XLIV.” But then we learned CBS rejected an ad from a man-only dating site. Stating, “…the creative is not within the Network’s Broadcast Standards for Super Bowl Sunday.” View the ad here.
One of the concerns the WMC has with the Tebow ad is that women should have a choice in determining what is best for them when it comes to reproductive rights. Pam Tebow had a choice after all. But did she really? Abortion is illegal in the Philippines and was when Tebow was pregnant with Tim.
With its slippery, ever-changing policies, CBS is practicing censorship, plain and simple.
CBS has no business, absolutely none, dictating morality. They are airing the Super Bowl after all. You know the Super Bowl, the annual winter rite where male athletes are super heroes and women wearing very little do suggestive dances on the sidelines to cheer them on.
8. CBS is the same organization that aired the Grammys. You know the Grammys, the show that featured Jamie Foxx singing his date rape anthem, “Blame it on the Alcohol.” Click here to read the repulsive lyrics.
9. At that same Grammy show last weekend, CBS bleeped out the f-words during a performance by Lil Wayne (who is headed to prison next week), Drake and Eminem.
10. According to the Parents Television Council report on violence in television, “Women in Peril,” CBS showed more incidences of violence against women on screen during 2004 to 2009 than ABC, NBC and even Fox. So while CBS wants to protect us from abortion and men kissing, and four-letter words, they have no problem airing violent imagery-especially when the victims of the violence are women.
Ladies, I’m not CBS so I am not going to try to dictate what is right and wrong, or what you should or shouldn’t do. If you enjoy football, or advertising, or the potato salad your friends serve, then by all means, tune in to the game, attend that party this Sunday. But be aware of what you are watching. The Super Bowl is not a family event. The Super Bowl is not some unifying, national celebration. The Super Bowl is a football game played by well-paid men, glorified for their athletic abilities. It is run by a major media entity with shifting censorship policies and it is paid for by organizations that make a pretty profit portraying women as sex objects and victims of violence.
Party on!
If you want to sign a petition asking CBS to pull the Focus on the Family ad, click here.
According to a recent report from the Parents Television Council, the incidence of violence against women on television (including an increase in female victimization as a punch line in a comedy series) is up significantly since 2004. (An incident is defined as a storyline that includes victims of violence.) Consider these statistics based on primetime television (excluding news and sports programs):
*Violence on television in general is up 2% since 2004.
*Yet violence on television against women is up 120% since 2004.
*There was a 400% increase in the depiction of teen girls as victims from 2004 to 2009.
*The most frequent type of violence on the screen was beating followed by credible threats, shooting, rape, stabbing and torture.
Television is not reality. We get that. But when you consider the studies that show exposure to filmed violence against women leads to decreased perceptions of violence, you see just how damaging this sexist programming is. It desensitizes society to violence against women. That is irresponsible. The television industry is trading the value and the safety of women for ratings.
What can you do? When you see gratuitous violence against women on television, or you notice a disproportionate number of storylines victimizing women, let the shows’ advertisers know how you feel. Women control at least 85% of consumer purchasing power in this country. We can make a difference.
(Trigger Warning) There was nationwide outrage and heartbreak yesterday as more details emerged and several arrests were made in the case of the 15 year old girl who was raped and beaten outside a high school dance. Due to the fact that many (10, 12, 20?) onlookers watched and cheered while the girl was attacked, the incident has grabbed our attention.
Sadly, this was not the only case of gang rape in the news. Several others were written about, mostly in local newspapers, but will probably never make the national spotlight or will fade away as soon as a different story takes their place.
-A 16 year old girl testified she was kidnapped and raped in Santa Rosa by three men.
-Earlier this month, three men were sentenced to life in prison for a gang rape in Florida.
-And then there was the woman who was raped by her Halliburton/KBR coworkers in Iraq. Apparently, she was not the only defense worker attacked. But this story made headlines when Senator Al Franken proposed an amendment that would withhold defense contracts from companies that restrict employees from bringing charges of assault to court. Read more here about Franken’s amendment and the 30 Republican senators who opposed it.
The presence of bystanders in the Richmond rape scares us and makes us question humanity. But every violent attack, including this one, calls for outrage –regardless of the headlines. One in six women and one in 33 men will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime.
As parents, we wonder how we can protect our children and how we can raise our sons and daughters to have compassion and respect for human life. For more facts on rape and information on prevention and victim support, visit RAINN, The Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network. For information on violence against women, visit the U.S. Department of Justice Office of on Violence Against Women.
(Trigger Warning) There was nationwide outrage and heartbreak yesterday as more details emerged and several arrests were made in the case of the 15 year old girl who was
